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Saturday, January 27, 2018

Rekindle Your Romance Date Night #3: Plan!

We need a date night plan! Without one, Jason and I will stay home, relax, and settle into our comfy rut. I mean, we've been developing this rut for a long time. (Ahem, a few decades.) Sometimes, having a rut to share with your spouse sounds great. Like the weather is terrible. We're exhausted at day's end. And if you're like us, you're playing catch-up after Christmas spending. So staying home may seem like the perfect solution.

Yet, what about romance?
What about the date night challenge?
What about spending quality romantic time with your spouse as much as you can in 2018?

I confess, this week, we didn't have a plan.

However, in full disclosure, after my workshop last Saturday, Jason suggested we go to dinner. So we went to a restaurant, chatted about the workshop, and talked about the type of house we should live in next. But, as thoughtful as the outing was, it wasn't a date.

You know what I mean, right? There's a difference between the things we do on a regular basis as a married couple--eating together, shopping, watching TV--and the things we do when we're focused on being romantic and dating. For each couple it's different. For me it means flirty glances, hand-holding, stolen kisses, and experiencing something new together. And did I mention ... flirting? (Yes, even as a long-time married couple, flirting with each other is still part of our dance.)

Actual dating is something new for us, and we can easily slip back into our stay-at-home comfort zone. However, my goal for this year is for us to date more and focus on rekindling our romance.

How about you?
Do you and your spouse have a date night plan?

If not, may I recommend my free resource "Rekindle Your Romance! 50+ Date Night Ideas for Married Couples?" I apologize for the blatant advertising. But, hey, it is free. It's packed with ideas for date nights. Couples can use the suggestions they like, and hopefully the 50+ ideas will stir up some creative date night possibilities of your own.

For us, we need to talk about our plans early in the week, or else too many days can pass without us dating or working on rekindling our romance.

Then we get too comfy in our rut.
Perhaps, feel bored.
Or even get grumpy.
(Or is that only me?)

Spontaneity has its place in marriage too. I'm all for surprises. An unexpected romantic getaway sounds fabulous, especially in the middle of winter.

But I also like having something to look forward to.
I enjoy daydreaming about Jason and me dating.
Where shall we go next?
Is there a local venue we haven't explored lately?

Where will you go with your spouse this weekend?
What are you going to see or do?
Remember, both of you can come up with ideas. If you can't agree on one, toss a coin. Go with one of your ideas this week, and your spouse's idea next week. The point is to go. Have fun. Be together.

Hold hands.
Smile at each other.
Tell each other special things along the way.
Whisper sweet nothings during that movie or walk.
Share ideas.

Let's make our marriages stronger, happier, and more fun!

Plan something enjoyable with your spouse for tonight or tomorrow, or next week.
Dating your husband/wife is worth every bit of effort it takes: planning, saving, getting a babysitter, etc. If you have a tight budget, that's okay. It's not about going anywhere fancy. It's about being together, being romantic, and having fun.

Date your spouse!

Mary Hanks writes about second chances, marriage restoration, and rekindling romance. Visit

If you missed the first two blogs in this Date Night series, check out:

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