Last week, I asked Jason if he would date me. And he said, "Yes."
It's easy for us to get busy with life, or to feel lazy and stay home, and forget about dating each other.
We're great friends. That in itself is pretty cool after forty years of marriage.
It might be easy to think friendship is enough.
But I still want to experience romance with the man I love.
I like for us to remember what drew us together in the first place.
And to talk about those things.
So we're dating.
And I'm sharing a little of our journey as we date as a married couple.
For many, a weekly date night is nothing new. If you've been dating your spouse regularly, good for you! You are a giant step ahead of us.
But for those who have kind of forgotten what it means to date, this blog might serve as a tiny reminder to rekindle your romance.
Things to think about:
- Dressing up can be fun. And it says something, doesn't it? You're worth a little fuss. I'm putting my going-out face on just for you! I've been looking forward to our time together.
- Going somewhere new can be a fabulous shared experience. And making new memories together can be priceless.
- Dating doesn't have to cost a lot of money to be special.
- Holding hands with your spouse is a beautiful connection.
- Kissing in the car (or on a walk) is still exciting.
One time, before we were married, Jason pulled up to a stop sign in a quiet neighborhood and gave me a big kiss. Guess who happened to drive by just then? Yep, my mother! (I was sixteen.) Oh, was she mad! And, boy, was I embarrassed! That night, I got a huge lecture about never doing that again--especially on our way back from church. (Yikes!)
But you know what? Ahem. Forty-plus years later, I still like stolen kisses from my sweetheart. It's exciting. And maybe a little sneaky--still. (Giggle.)
Not too long ago, I got an idea to compile a list of inexpensive places to go for date nights, so I asked some of my married friends to help me generate ideas. We came up with over fifty suggestions! Isn't that cool?
Here's #34 from Rekindle Your Romance:
- Use Coupons for your next outing. Clip those coupons to go to a restaurant for less—or to one you wouldn’t otherwise be able to afford. One of my contributors said they like to go to a discount movie and then use coupons or a buy one/get one free deal at a restaurant. This is a great “deal” date night.
The thing about using coupons or a gift card is that you can go places together where you haven't been before, or to somewhere you haven't been able to afford. For our date night, we didn't clip a coupon, but Jason had received a Christmas gift card from his employer to a restaurant we think of as too expensive for us. So, on Saturday night, we went to that restaurant for a nice meal and an enjoyable time together. We did a lot of smiling and talking. Remember, dating is something you do intentionally. It's spending quality time with your spouse, sharing the experience, and bonding together. And it's practicing those little romantic things that add spice to your relationship.
We're more of the get-a-hamburger couple. But in my younger days, a great meal out meant a steak and a baked potato with the trimmings. Your special food might be sushi or a buffet dinner or going somewhere with a great view of a lake. On this date night, we both ordered steak and a potato. Knowing we had the gift card to cover half of our expenses helped in our decision-making. You can see I like mine well-done! (If you don't eat meat, I apologize for the photo.)
I have to admit, even with the $25 gift card we went a little over the $25 date-night budget.
But we had a great time. And the company was pretty fantastic.
Dating is a bit of a novelty for us. Yes, we're that older, comfortable couple. But I want to keep experiencing romance with my man. And now that we live in town, we can go places easier than we could living in the country. I'm also collecting date night ideas. And I'm hoping you'll catch the spirit of dating your spouse too!
If it's been a while since the two of you have spent time doing fun things together, maybe you should ask your spouse for a date. Remind him he's "still the one."
I did. And we're still having fun!
Remember those things that drew you together in the first place.
Sneak a few kisses.
Have fun making new memories.
Since Jason and I started dating again, I find myself daydreaming about our next date. Where shall we go next? What can we do that would rekindle our romance? Aren't his eyes beautiful? See there! Dating my spouse is already rekindling our romance!
If you'd like some fun (inexpensive) ideas for dating your spouse, get the free resource, Rekindle Your Romance! HERE.
Mary Hanks writes stories about second chances, marriage restoration, and rekindling romance. Visit her website at maryehanks.com.